if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
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