: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Randomize
