Porn is love you can see.
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
Randomize