We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Randomize
