Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
