People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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