okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Randomize
