Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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