He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Randomize
