its not stalking. its research.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Randomize