im having a threesome with these popsicles
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
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