I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
