YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
