hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
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