wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
