People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
We don't watch enough power rangers
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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