He asked to "fluff my boner.."
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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