At least make sure they are 18
Why
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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