"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize