i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Randomize
