Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
