on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Randomize
