I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Randomize
