We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
