Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
