see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
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