I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
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