Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
I look excited, but its just a facade.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
