I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
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