Small penises have feelings too.
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize