im gay
i know
yea but for you.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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