I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Randomize
