so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
