Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize