i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
