she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
it's not cheating when I paid for it
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
Randomize
