Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Randomize