I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
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