I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize