I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Randomize
