I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Randomize
