i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
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