What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
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