Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Randomize
