3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize