it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
