careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
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