Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I love how my cats smell like pot.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Randomize
