i just google imaged poop.
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
my being single is dangerous.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
