Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
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