He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Randomize